Okay, I wrote about this a year ago and nothing has really changed. I really am ready to come out to my parents. I'm out to pretty much everyone else I know and I'm loving it, because it's just nice not to have to pretend. It's nice to know that the people you care about know a bit about where you're coming from, and aren't assuming things about you that aren't true.
That being said, I had plenty of opportunities to tell my parents this weekend and I... just... couldn't... do... it. The words got stuck as they were about to pass from my lips, and if they had blurted out I probably would have had a heart attack. I really was that anxious about the whole thing. The worst part is I don't know why.
Like I said before, I am confident that my parents' reactions won't be that bad. I guess I'm just a little scared because my mind always seems to jump to the worst possible reaction. I know guys who didn't get the chance to come out. They were dragged out by parents who couldn't possibly accept the fact that their sons were gay, and who essentially kicked them out when they found out the truth. I am blessed to know that my folks won't even consider doing something like that, so what am I scared of?
I had a good opportunity this weekend. My dad and Mom were talking about parenting in general, and I overheard Dad say, "We may not always agree with what our kids do, but our job is to support them no matter what." I mean... seriously? What better chance did I have? I should have busted in there and said, "Well, looks like I'm in luck, Padre!"
But... nope... couldn't do it. Does anyone (gay, ex-gay, heck...even straight!) have any good advice? I mean, I know that I should wait for the right time, but even when the time is right I can't bring myself to pluck up the courage.