Saturday, January 02, 2010

Is This Thing Still On?

Well, it has been two months since I last posted on this thing. I really feel bad about that. I've never been the most active blogger but I am so appreciative of the community that I've had the chance to build here for the past four years. Can you believe it's been that long? I've met so many wonderful people and even the arguments that have gone on here have really helped strengthen me and make me into a bolder, more assertive, and hopefully, more Christ-like person. So I am sorry for leaving people in the dark for the past two months. I wasn't taking a fast or anything, I just realized that for the first time in a long time, I really didn't have anything to say.

And that is probably just due to the nature of this blog. Although I've covered a variety of subjects here, most of my posts have centered around homosexuality, and my various perspectives, opinions, and disagreements about its relation to Christianity, the church, the ex-gay movement, and culture. Most of these posts weren't mere op-eds meant to get my opinion across. Instead, I used them, and the subsequent discussions, to pin down exactly where I was on this massive, complex, and if I may say, very queer spectrum of religion and sexuality. I've said what I thought about reparative therapy, the likelihood of orientation change, gay rights, gay identity, Exodus, etc.

Now I'm at a place where I feel I've said it all. To borrow an old phrase from gay activists of years past, I'm here, I'm queer, and I'm used to it. I've always been comfortable being celibate and I've always felt that I was in a good position, but I still felt the desire to talk about it in order to further articulate what I believed to be true. Now I feel that it's articulated. Although nothing about my opinions has changed, at the same time I feel that when it comes to sharing them, that ship has already sailed, at least in terms of this blog. I mean, really, what more do I have to say about the gay/ex-gay debate? In my mind, I don't have much, and for my own sanity I think it's time I stopped talking about it so much.

Oh, of course I will drop in my two cents if something awful is going on (on either the part of gay activists or the religious right or ex-gay ministries). I certainly said what I thought about Uganda, and as other issues arise, I'll say what I think about them, as well. After all, isn't that what blogging is for? But I do have to admit that the "all-gay, all-the-time" blogging will likely stop. I'm sure there are other issues related to homosexuality that I'll want to drop an opinion on one day, but for now, I'm ready to just live my life and enjoy it, without having to worry about all the "gay stuff," as I've said to a few friends. I'm content in my walk with the Lord and where He has brought my sexual behavior, so really... What more is there to be said?

But don't worry, dear readers, I still have a lot of things to talk about. For one, there will be some amazing trips for me happening this year, including a study abroad adventure in Belize come March. I'll also be student teaching at a local high school, so I know I'll have things to say about that (although they will probably be very, very general, seeing as blogging about work isn't always the wisest choice). I have graduate school coming up in August, or at least I hope I do. I'm applying. I don't know; there are simply a lot of things to me. I'm not just one issue. I am diverse, and I want to share that diversity with you guys.

So here is to 2010. Yes, my blog is still going. I'm going to try to post every Saturday. What will the topics be? Who knows. But I'm looking forward to the adventure. Happy New Year, everyone!

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