Monday, November 26, 2007

Well, It Happened!

Well, Thanksgiving Break was a nice time for me. I got to see my family, some friends, and eat a lot of good food. It really was a blessing to be around all the people I love, but that's not what this post is about, and I'm sure you guys know that.

Over break I found an opportunity to finally come out to my parents. I was nervous as heck about it and had to pray a lot beforehand. I also had some friends who knew I was about to go in for the kill and they prayed along with me. They know who they are, and if they're reading this, thanks again guys! You're a blessing.

I won't go into all the details, mainly because I'm sure a lot of the conversation (which lasted for four hours) is something that many of you have heard before. Yes, there was a bit of denial going on with my folks. Remember, they're in their mid-60s, and they're a little naive about what "gay" even means. They went from thinking that I simply was reacting against bad experiences with girls (experiences that I tried to stress were bad because I was gay), to thinking that I simply had not met the right girl, to thinking that I had been influenced or indoctrinated into thinking I was gay. I suppose those reactions happen even with the most liberal parents. I'll admit it hurt a bit, but other than that the tone of the conversation was pretty mild, like any of our other arguments about politics, religion, or philosophy.

I had started by telling my parents that I was celibate. Then I told them I was gay, then I told them about my boyfriend. It was probably a little too much to take in for one night, but I was just so excited to get things off my chest that I probably wasn't thinking too clearly. The good part is they understand and accept my celibacy. They also think that everyone is somewhat bisexual (remember, they're hippies), and that I'm too young to say I'm "one way or the other." I'll give them that, though I will say that some people are more bisexual than others. ;-)

At the very least, there was hugging and many repetitions of the phrase "I love you." There was even an unexpected high-five from my mom when I told her some of the compliments that Hitch has given me. I have a feeling high-fives don't happen often in coming out stories. The day after we went to church and visited my grandma and life went on like normal. I understand that everything takes time and eventually my parents will understand who I am a bit more. Right now they don't, but that's okay. They don't have to understand completely. In fact, it would be nearly impossible for them to understand completely. They are my parents, and they are there to love me. They still do, and they stressed that. I will always have a place in our family, no matter what. I'm so grateful for that. After all, home isn't the place where you are the most understood or even the most loved. It's the place where, if you have to go there, they have to take you in. I'm still fortunate to know that I have a home.

Also, now that my parents know of my sexual preferences they just might look at my Internet history. If they do, they might see this blog (and if you're reading this, hi guys!) So, if I go offline or something, you'll know why. I'm seriously not expecting that to happen, though. Do remember that I maintain two blogs with the exact same content, though. Happy trails!

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